Etymology of 'dearjoan'

In March of 1993, five guys in Florida formed the band Tabitha's Secret. During the two years they were together, this band performed a song called 'Dear Joan', written by frontman Rob Thomas. He also wrote a little song called '3 AM' during this time - you may have heard of it. Anyway, the band split in 1995. Rob, along with drummer Paul Doucette and bassist Brian Yale, went on to form the band matchbox twenty. They started out playing songs from their original band, and even recorded '3 AM' on their first album, Yourself Or Someone Like You. The two other members of Tabitha's Secret sued matchbox twenty for using '3 AM' - a messy and bitter battle. And, because of this legal escapade, matchbox twenty rarely ever even plays the songs from their band of origin, meaning that 'Dear Joan' has faded into obscurity. Only the band's family and friends, die-hard matchbox twenty fans, and a handful of Floridians even remember the song anymore.

'Dear Joan' is a song about a screwed-up relationship. The guy's asking the girl for help, but at the same time, mistreats her. It's a beautifully confusing song, painting the contours of a real-life frituation. Check out the lyrics below!

In October of 2000, I wrote two versions of a poem. I emailed one to the love of my life, and I signed it Dear Joan. After that, I started signing other emails as Dear Joan. When I signed up for fanfiction.net in April of 2001, I altered the pseudonym to dearjoan, to make it look cleaner.

Thus the mystery is revealed.

- dj


'Dear Joan', by Rob Thomas:


Dear Joan
I've almost forgotten
The pane in the window
The blue dress in the doorway

Dear Joan
Help me remember
The face I forget
And the traps that I've sprung

I guess I've grown tired
It's just what's expected of me
To tear your heart
From the inside to the outside
You know I was wired
I just couldn't help it
The hundred thousand times I hurt you


Dear Joan I wanted to say
I'm sorry for the screaming last night,
And the nights before
I've wanted more from this
Than anything I've ever known
Dear Joan

Dear Joan
Your face has a brightness
That I've never seen
In the years that I've known you

Dear Joan
I'd pick up the pieces
But some scattered too far
They flew when I kicked them ['cross the room]

I know you believed
When I said it was over
You stood by me patiently
Waiting and brooding
So deeply in love
With every face that I've shown

Dear Joan I wanted to say
I'm sorry for the screaming last night,
And the nights before
I've wanted more from this
Than anything I've ever known
Dear Joan

Once I forget
Twice I'm a fool
Three times I wrap
My hands around your neck
While your sleeping
So quietly sleeping
Sleeping and dreaming

Dear Joan
Don't walk out the doorway
Because if you did, I believe
I could honestly kill you

Dear Joan I wanted to say
I'm sorry for the screaming last night,
And the nights before
I've wanted more from this
Than anything I've ever known
Dear Joan