Fanfiction : Sports : 102 Reasons Michael Waltrip Rules
By Kellyanne Lynch
2002
UPDATE: I realised that I had one item twice. So I switched its repeat
with yet ANOTHER reason Mikey rules!
***
The original idea for
these lists was from Christy Gordon, who wrote "100 Reasons Jeff Gordon Rules".
Inspired by that piece, Caritas followed it up with her own "101 Reasons Dale
Earnhardt Jr. Rules". Well guess what? The two of them together got me going on
this list, "102 Reasons Michael Waltrip Rules". Now it's got me wondering if
somebody out there's going to beat it with 103 reasons yet a FOURTH driver
rules!!!
Anyway, here's my list. I'm going to split it in two as well,
to make it an easier read.
Oh, just as a side note, I was supposed to be
working on a take-home midterm exam instead of writing this list. So, if I fall
asleep in the middle of it now and flunk, then Christy and Caritas, it is all
y'all's fault!!! JK ; )
- dj
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102 Reasons
Michael Waltrip Rules:
1. He can really GET DOWN with that Turkey Walk!
2. He's the brother of legendary Darrell Waltrip.
3. He's
strange.
4. Just listening to him makes you happy.
5. He has an
adorable smile.
6. He talks to his kids in the middle of interviews.
7. He was in the most frightful single-car accident in the history of
NASCAR and walked away unscathed.
8. He helped Junior win the first
Busch Series race this year in the #3 car, (he COULD have passed him! I know you
Junior fans'll deny that up and down, but it's true!!! And you all know that,
deep down).
9. He and Kenny Wallace are HILARIOUS together.
10.
He and his brother are even MORE of a riot.
11. He co-hosts Inside
Winston Cup on the Speed Channel (too bad I can't get it too!).
12. He's
the friendliest guy in NASCAR.
13. He has a seize-the-moment type of
attitude - he doesn't let opportunities slip by him.
14. He's not afraid
to take risks.
15. He won the Daytona 500 in 2001 (YAY!!!!!!!!!).
16. He's going to have an awesome year, whether or not he makes a lot of
top ten finishes.
17. Dale Earnhardt saw something special in Mikey when
he asked him to join DEI.
18. He puts God first.
19. He's a
Southern gentleman.
20. He's twins in that Napa ad.
21. He has a
gorgeous southern accent.
22. He is the proud father of two adorable
daughters.
23. He never has a bad word to say about ANYBODY.
24.
Everybody loves him.
25. He's a wonderful role model - one that the
parents will DEFINITELY approve of!
26. He is one fine man.
27.
He has the same birthday as Willie Nelson.
28. He drives a Chevy, which
is the best out of the four types of stock cars that are currently being raced.
29. He looks so cute when he scrunches up his nose.
30. He won
the Charlotte-Daytona Dash Series championship in 1983, at the age of twenty.
31. He's one of the few drivers who regularly races in both the Busch
Series AND Winston Cup, meaning he races twice as much as the other drivers.
Boy, must he be tired!
32. He never appears tired.
33. He's
humble.
34. He's had eight wins and eleven poles in the Busch Series.
35. He looks incredible in blue.
36. He looks awesome in red
too.
37. Heck, he looks great in ANY colour!
38. He let Kerry
Earnhardt drive his Busch Series car last year (WHAT was he THINKING?!? JK!).
39. He won the Winston all-star race in 1996, becoming the first driver
to win the race after transferring from the Winston Open.
40. He
accomplished this by snatching the lead away from Dale Earnhardt and Terry
Labonte, who were racing side-by-side at the front of the field.
41. Did
I mention that he accomplished this during the last ten-lap sprint?
42.
AND that he started last?
43. He is DEFINITELY somebody you can look up
to, not only because of what he's like as a person, but also because he's SOO
tall! SIX FOOT FIVE!!! (That's a full foot taller than me!)
44. He's his
own car-owner in the Busch Series.
45. He also manages that car.
46. Those Aaron's Dream Machine ads that he does with his wife are SOO
sweet!
47. He's a family man.
48. He's been happily married for
over nine years now.
49. He is kind to his fans… wait, what am I talking
about? He's nice to EVERYBODY!!!
50. He's devoted to who and what he
loves.
51. He is the 23rd driver EVER to reach his 500th Winston Cup
start.
52. He likes all kinds of music, (that is ESPECIALLY important to
somebody like me, a HUGE music fan!).
53. He pays no nevermind to
rumours.
54. He gave up golfing, one of his hobbies, so that he could
spend more time with his family.
55. He's talented.
56. He has
strong moral fibres.
57. He's good at cheering people up.
58. He
gives money to the Motor Racing Outreach.
59. His favourite movie is "As
Good As It Gets", which is a VERY psychology-oriented movie, and I'm in a grad
program for counseling psych (Eee!).
60. The colour scheme of his car is
cool.
61. He likes to work in his backyard.
62. There's nothing
cuter than a guy who loves Chicken-n-Dumplings.
63. He looked kind of
like Flea from the Red Hot Chili Peppers when he was a kid.
64. He's so
funny in that Napa ad where he's talking how everything's so quiet, then's like
"I'm at the wrong track!" LOL!
65. He's just such a happy guy!
66. He can make you laugh.
67. He's got beautiful blue eyes.
68. He managed to crash a car that said "Band-Aid" on it.
69.
He's even cheerful when his car's all jacked up.
70. His crew chief's
known as Slugger.
71. He does that curvy thing with his hat right.
72. He's the baby BY FAR in his household.
73. When he was
eighteen, he won the Mini-Modified division track championship at Kentucky Motor
Speedway.
74. Before that, he drove seven wins in twenty starts.
75. Did I mention that he was driving a Mercury Capri, with only
four-cylinders?
76. He looks cool in his shades.
77. He went
after his dream of becoming a race car driver, though others doubted him,
(including his own brother).
78. He was voted Most Popular driver in
1983 and 1984 in the Goody Dash series.
79. He's got a nice laugh.
80. He has his own fan club.
81. His picture on his rookie card
is just too cute!
82. He's always coming up with some of the most
whacked-out things to say.
83. When he won a Busch Series race in
Bristol in 1993, he made the first ever backwards lap around the track.
84. That backwards lap was in memory of the late Alan Kulwicki.
85. This was after Alan Kulwicki beat him for Rookie of the Year in
1986; Mikey came in second.
86. He also proposed to his wife that day,
in victory lane (SUCH a romantic!).
87. He used to help out Dale
Earnhardt in the early 1990's sometimes by driving his Busch Series car for him.
88. He won the second Twin 125 this year (YAY!).
89. He is
always praising his pit crew.
90. He also praises his brother, though he
grew up in Darrell's shadow.
91. He took time to teach drivers of the
athletes at the Olympics how to drive in the snow. Which meant that he helped
keep EVERYBODY there safe!
92. He carried the Olympic torch this time
around, through Charlotte NC.
93. He never seems to get hat head.
94. How cute is a nickname like Mikey? VERY!!!
95. He's the only
one who can rival his brother in weirdness.
96. When the public
projected a negative opinion of NASCAR after Dale Earnhardt's death, Mikey
delivered what Tony Stewart called "a sermon" to his fellow drivers at Talladega
when they were feeling down. One of the things he talked about was looking out
for one another. He said: "I promise, I'll give you my word, I will take care of
you all if you all take care of me. Let's be safe out there today."
97.
After these words, all of NASCAR's Winston Cup drivers were silent (Now THAT'S
quite a feat!).
98. He savours every day of life.
99. He's a
Taurus, the sign of the bull. Taureans tend to be both loyal and headstrong.
They also tend to place value on the wealth and social status of themselves and
others. When a Taurean sets his mind to something, he will likely achieve it due
to persistence. Some see Taureans as stubborn.
100. Even though he gets
an awful lot of transmission and engine failures, and always seems to get
involved in other people's wrecks, he keeps his spirits up.
101. He
doesn't win a whole heck of a lot, but he keeps on going cause he loves the
sport.
102. Michael Waltrip is a winner.